A mixed up muddled up few weeks

Gosh time is flying. I cannot believe we are half way through the 2nd month of the year.  The year certainly has started with a bang – Max started Grade 4 (STD 2 for the older ones around!) and the twins Grade 3 in the same class for the 1st time ever. The second week of school heralded Grade meetings and this year I managed to attend ALL of the boys meetings EVER! Helped hugely by the fact that Max has now moved up to Senior Phase ( HEEEELLPPP!) and the twins are in the SAME class – a logistic blessing for a mom like me. I attended all 3 evenings of Grade Meetings to advertise and recruit assistance for the bi-annual Fair I am convening. So the 2nd week of school was BUSY: Bring on the 3rd week and I have meetings for both the PTA and of course the Fair…. and work has been rather busy as I work hard and try to show I am capable and ready for a move up.

The jump to Grade 4 is quite a big one – extra murals go from being a measly 45minutes to a whooping 1 1/2 hours. And Max has been doing karate and cricket for the past two years – recently having also joined a Cricket club. It means my poor “baby” is now getting home at around 5pm 4 x a week and has not done a stitch of homework. Now I am NOT a pushy mom  (I don’t think and he has happily taken on the sports himself) but I am starting to think he has too much on his plate and have said as much. Very sulky pre-teen Max emerged (again – he has been popping up a lot recently!) and defiantly said “Well you tell me what to drop then “. Sigh …. I have no idea – he loves them both – I just worry as I see my tired boy every night flop into bed with dark circles under his eyes – adamant he is coping and of course, NOT tired.

What is it about children and tired – it seems to be something they NEVER are – teach my how my darling boys!

And then this week, a bombshell as my beloved grandfather passed away – not altogether unexpectedly , but not quite expected either. He and my gran (who passed a few years ago while I was in Sweden) have been “my person” for as long as I can remember. I have loved them both so much and enjoyed so much the time I have spent with them. I have little reminders of my gran at home, and yesterday my mom dropped off a painting I had wanted that had been on the wall in my grandpa’s room in Frail Care. It has already found a place on a wall in hour home. It seems I have started collecting paintings from those who have passed – we have quite a few from Björn’s mom which we love, and when my gran (paternal) passed away last August I also had a few of the paintings/pictures she had given me when she moved out of her home.

Searching through photos this morning I came across one from our wedding that was taken with Bjorn & I, his mom, my folks and grandparents. Looking at the photo today I noticed, with a lump in my throat, that 3 of the people in the photo I was looking at had passed away since August last year…..

In my social circle lots has been happening too – some not so nice things that really make you stop and think and realise that actually despite everything we are bloody lucky. We have 3 healthy, happy boys (ok well most of the time!) and a great family. The main reason for moving from Sweden to South Africa was to be with my family and for the boys to get a little SA culture and enjoy my family values – and lately it has been wonderful to see. My mom has stepped up and done a lot for the boys this year, I have seen my aunts and uncles a lot. and spent some time with my grandpa. My sixte, in Langebaan, is due a visit soon…… much to the boys delight…

We had a great workshop at work a few weeks ago – a version of team building I suppose – but it was so much more than that – and the one word that stuck with me was “giving GRACE”. I like to think I am tolerant and forgiving but the words “giving Grace” seem to be softer, gentler, kinder and more allowing and accepting. So I have started using the concept. We never really know what path others have walked or the journey they have had  to get to this point – and oh my gosh does it effect who we become and where we arrive  today… but it not a path that cannot change.. so I have decide to “give Grace” more freely and openly.

A guilty high note was going to see James Blunt last night – the tickets had been booked last year sometime and I had been looking forward to it – being a fan of the melancholy crooner as it were :). The death of my grandfather however, made me question the appropriateness of a night of fun so soon – but I went. The 3rd song of the set seem aimed at me and my recent loss and the change in my demeanour was palpable (to me in any event) as all the lyrics resonated with the passing of my grandfather – but Mr Blunt is flipping awesome. A funny man who talks to his audience and made us laugh – the songs were amazing and sounded just like they do on the CD’s. I particularly liked the “quite” song whose name I got hysterically wrong and I guess must be a taste of things to come – so I am hooked!  We had FANTASTIC seats so I could actually see his face – a rarity these days. So I left the show with  a smile on my face, a wet phone in my handbag (Story for another day 🙂 ) and a warm feeling in my heart.

Happy week-end, am wondering how I am going to manage as the soggy cellphone means my connection to THE WORLD is temporarily suspended…..

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